Why I don't give a damn about the iPhone

Well, a number of reasons prevent me from not giving a damn about the iPhone, or smart phones in general. The first is that for all the venues of geekdom I inhabit, techno-geekery isn't on the list. I don't want a gadget unless I need a gadget. My saving throw versus teh shiny is +47, and immune to magical effects, even when cast by PR warlocks like Steve Jobs (I believe he's a an Epic half-elf 27th level podcaster under 4th Edition rules). Call me strange, but there you have it.

Speaking of need, most smartphones are intended for those that are psychotropically addicted to their intravenous e-mail drips and even if I were to fall into that category--my wife would argue it's the case--my daily commute is 15 minutes on a bad day, so I'm never that far from the suckling teat of teh intarweebs should the cravings strike. Unlike my former CNET colleagues in the greater Bay Area, I'm not trapped in a mass-transit rail coffin for 2-3 hours per day jonesin' for my music, mail and a nice game of Tetris. It's also why my household didn't get an iPod until 18 months ago, and all that little gizmo gets used for is an enhancement to the wife's car stereo. Saves us the trouble of hauling CDs in and out of the house.

But the real reason I've not lept atop the dogpile of iPhone fanatics comes via this little back-o'-the-napkin calculation from fellow Louisville geek Ben Thomas:

"AT&T’s Text Messages Cost $1310 per Megabyte."

What is this, 1983? I'll consider a seat on the mobile Web bandwagon when data access charges look like a figure from the 21st century, not a bad econ flashback to Reaganomics.